We’re Not That Choosy: Emerging Evidence of a Progression Bias in Romantic Relationships
Dating is widely thought of as a test phase for romantic relationships, during which new romantic partners carefully evaluate each other for long-term fit. However, this cultural narrative assumes that people are well equipped to reject poorly suited ...
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Growing evidence suggests that people have a bias for decisions that move romantic relationships toward commitment rather than dissolution. Single individuals appear to be open to a broad range of dating partners (Joel, Eastwick, & Finkel, 2017; Kurzban & Weeden, 2007) and motivated to see potential dating partners in a positive light (Berscheid et al., 1976) to the extent that they will overlook potential flaws and incompatibilities (Eastwick et al., 2011; Joel et al., 2014; Slotter & Gardner, 2012). People in new dating relationships tend to become rapidly attached to their new dating partners (Fagundes & Schindler, 2012; Heffernan et al., 2012) and adjust their dating standards to match their partners (L. Campbell et al., 2015; Gere & Impett, 2018; Gerlach et al., 2019). The decision to move in with a romantic partner is often made with little conscious deliberation (Lindsay, 2000; Manning & Smock, 2005; Sassler, 2004; Stanley et al., 2006). Such investments, in turn, serve as barriers to relationship dissolution (Le & Agnew, 2003; Rusbult, 1980, 1983; Tran et al., 2019). The decision to end a relationship tends to be highly effortful and difficult (Dailey, Pfiester et al., 2009; Joel, MacDonald, & Page-Gould, 2018; VanderDrift et al., 2009), even when the relationship is unhealthy or even abusive (Arriaga, 2002; Arriaga et al., 2013; Rusbult & Martz, 1995).
